However, everyone around Frick and Frack felt the effects of incident, the burn, for a week. The typical lighthearted engagement was gone. Frick and Frack pretended each other were invisible.
You can probably substitute in names for similar situations – triggered often by misunderstandings; the price is high in lost productivity, creativity and even safety risk.
What would you do? It only takes one to change the dynamic.
Frick, a student of Spiral Impact, realized he had a conflict and was consciously allowing it to be destructive. He needed a little time to get centered and clear on what he wanted. It took him a few days.
He knew it takes just one to shift the conflict to be innovative – that’s how Spiral Impact works. One person can change the dynamics.
When Frick was ready — and the appropriate opening appeared, he calmly asked Frack, “For how long shall we not talk?”
Frack reacted back initially, “After what you did?!”
Frick, calmly from center, spiraled again curiously asking, “What was your experience, how did you see the incident?”
They both realized they shared an event, but each of their experiences of what actually happened was very different. Frick, continued to ask more questions and listening without interjecting his viewpoint.
Adding in another principle of Spiral Impact, Frick revisited the team’s intention, “We want to create the best widget and enjoy our team in the process. When we aren’t talking we have no hope of that. Tell me more about what you experienced….”
The resolution wasn’t instantaneous it was a process – like a spiral. The gift in the end was a deeper understanding of each other and the ability to engage better than before. Please add your experience!