What is easy in the moment – judgment, separation, and even condemnation – is actually more difficult and costly in the medium and long-run.
While division is playing out overtly big time in our nation – division can happen on a covert scale in the workplace and our families (okay, maybe overtly too!).
When we hurry to conclude and categorize complex issues, we often put people in boxes, perhaps even label them with a slogan, and then place outside on a shelf – creating division
While categorization is a very efficient tool for understanding the world around us, if we’re too quick to put people in a box, we often miss out on important dialogue that bridges and creates aligned energy, which brings the best possible ideas forward.
It is easy to fall prey to snap judgments about people, things, and events without looking closely and considering the nuances, those subtle differences that are fairly important. For example, something that at first glance may seem simple like office layout can become a highly charged issue if the nuances aren’t explored. These nuances are formed through each person’s experiences, beliefs, and preferences. These can vary widely even within a race, gender, or culture.
In my work, I’ve witnessed palpable physical, mental, and emotional relief when people choose to explore nuances with curiosity rather than cutting quickly to categorize one another in a box.
When resistance melts; bridges appear and innovation blossoms.
It’s a thrill to experience the ‘Ahhh…YES!’ that comes from releasing resistance toward others. What seems like extra time to explore nuances of position and belief actually saves time and money in the medium and long-run. And, likely expands the possibilities for better solutions.
Most people don’t necessarily have to have their ‘way.’
They want to be heard, considered, and valued, rather than disregarded.
In a world at odds, attention to nuance is at the core to building bridges. What to do?
- Consider your intention – do you want to build bridges or construct boxes? Boxes while quick and easy, are divisive; bridges last longer and provide a path to a new place.
- Get calm and centered – this broadens your perspective and ability to create trust. When you are centered people don’t feel the temptation to push back because you are not pushing.
- Acknowledge first and ask a lot of open-ended questions to learn the nuances of the other person’s position, those subtle differences that are fairly important.
Using my methodology “Spiral Impact” involves looking at things from many different angles, exploring the nuance. While simple it isn’t easy.
Will you join me and Spiral into the nuance of things? Build a bridge, not a box?